


Take Me Home

by Koalagriton



Category: Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles (TV 2012)
Genre: Turtle Tots
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-09-15
Updated: 2015-10-19
Packaged: 2018-04-20 22:11:32
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 16,612
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4804103
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Koalagriton/pseuds/Koalagriton
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>April is 10, the turtles are 8. Mikey knows he's not supposed to talk to the human even if it is a child like him, with blue eyes and freckles like him... who also doesn't have a mom like he does and has been crying alone like he has for the past day. But he's lost and hungry... and the girl says she has cake.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Take Me Home

Written to the tune of Sia's Breathe Me.

 

Be my friend, hold me.

Wrap me up, unfold me.

I am small, I'm needy.

Warm me up and breathe me.

 

**Take Me Home.**

 

Mikey's hiccups echoed around the sewer pipe as he huddled in a dark corner. He was lost. ' _It was on purpose!'_ He thought angrily as more tears welled up in his eyes and then dripped down his freckled cheeks. ' _They'll be sorry I'm gone!'_ He hiccuped again and bit his lips to silence the sobs building up in his chest.

 

“I want to go home...” He whispered miserably into the dark when he could find his voice.

 

Michelangelo hadn't meant to hurt anyone or break anything. He only wanted to play with his brothers. They used to play together all the time, even Donnie and Leo. Now, since they started their ninja training with weapons they were suddenly too old to play with him and everything he did or asked was 'annoying'.

 

“I want to practice my kata, go bug Raph.” Leo had told him over his shoulder without even bothering to listen to the awesome game he had in mind.

 

Usually he would just sigh and trod off to do as he was told but he'd just been with Raph who told him to leave him alone and go play with Leo and before that Donnie had told him he wasn't interested in children's games anymore and _'Don't touch anything, Mikey! You mess everything up'_.

 

“But Leo, it'll be fun! I just made this game up and we can go play with the others too if you play with me.” Michelangelo pulled Leonardo around, interrupting his practice so he'd just look at him. If only he'd let him explain...

 

“Mikey!” Leo pulled his arm away, annoyed he'd been interrupted. “I already told you, I'm busy! Go bother someone else.” He placed his limbs back into the starting stance of the kata they'd been taught that morning carefully, looking at each of his arms and legs and making tiny adjustments until he was satisfied.

 

“You're no fun, Leo!” Mikey called out angrily. “You're so boring! Raph is right, you are such a _jerk_!” He yelled out the ugly word Raph had started using when he was mad at Leo and hesitated. The moment the words left his mouth Leo turned to him and showed a hurt and betrayed look on his face for a couple seconds before it morphed into fury.

 

“I am not! I don't care about your games any more, _Mikey_.” He spat out his name as if it were an insult, every word dripping with venom. “They're for _babies_. Stop being a baby and grow up like the rest of us!”

 

“I'm NOT a baby!” Mikey's anger rose and bubbled over. He was known for his legendary tantrums since he was very little, rivalled only by Raph's furious meltdowns. Right now his anger didn't turn into the sobbing, kicking mess it usually did, it was sharp, directed and he used it to plant his hands on his big brother's plastron and shove him backwards as he yelled. “Stop calling me a baby!”

 

He pushed the larger turtle with more force than he had intended and Leo failed to catch his footing, tripping backwards until he crashed into the weapons wall where the stand for the long-poled halberds and spears was. The whole thing lurched upon impact, swinging back to strike the wall and then forwards, tipping over the small turtle sitting underneath who looked up terrified as he realised he wouldn't get out of the way in time.

 

A high pitched scream, a loud crash and then another frantic call for help brought Splinter running into the dojo with his other sons behind him. He found Michelangelo sobbing, pulling on a limp forest green hand buried under the weapons rack. There was blood. “Michelangelo! Stand back!”

 

The little one did as he was told, trying to tell him he was sorry and 'it was an accident'. That he didn't meant to hurt his brother. Splinter ignored him as he pushed him to the others and heaved to lift the rack off the small turtle underneath.

 

Sharp pain in his foot made him notice there were pieces of glass over the rugs, the little shrine he had erected had been knocked over and the frail items on it shattered. “Go outside! There's glass. GO!” He yelled at them and they hurried away pulling a distressed Mikey behind them.

 

“What did you DO?” Donnie yelled at him when Splinter had carried his brother's unmoving body into the other room and shut the door behind him.

 

He had told his sons to wait outside and when Mikey tried to explain what had happened again he had received a stern and angry look that said 'not now' and he would be punished later. He spent a lot of his time punished recently. Even more than Raph with his angry outbursts and swearing.

 

“It was an accident!” Mikey sobbed. “I pushed him and he fell into the...”

 

“You're not supposed to play in the dojo! How _stupid_ are you?” Raph bellowed, getting in his face. His eyes were frightened even if he sounded furious.

 

“I wasn't playing!” Mikey answered angrily.

 

“Stop it!” Donnie pushed them apart before turning back on Mikey. His voice was even and serious, it was terrifying. “You could have killed him, Mikey! Don't you see how stupid that was?”

 

Michelangelo recoiled from his brothers. “But he's okay, right, Donnie? I didn't mean to hurt him. He'll be fine, right?” He glanced between his brother who had fearful looks on their faces. They'd all stepped out of the dojo when they were told but he'd watched from the entrance and seen the blood, and how still his brother was. He seemed to be sleeping.

 

His brothers walked off to sit and wait in the living room without looking at him. Michelangelo ran off into the sewers, tears in his eyes and his heart in his throat.

 

_You could have killed him._

 

Donnie's words echoed in his head as he looked up at the metal grate. The sun was going down again, the stripes of light on the floor were almost orange. He couldn't go back, not after what he'd done, they barely put up with him before. _They probably don't want me any more._ If they did they would have come looking for him by now but they didn't even turn around or call after him when he ran off.

 

His stomach hurt from hunger and he was shivering from the cold. He crawled over to the sunlight to try get a bit of warmth on his skin. He huddled into a small ball and his pitiful sobbing started again.

 

“Hello?”

 

He heard a young voice coming from above and he quieted down, keeping very still.

 

“Are you hurt?”

 

He didn't move as a shadow passed in front of the light from the grate. He heard a gasp and he got up and started crawling away.

 

“Wait don't go! I'm not going to hurt you. Are you okay? Are you hurt?”

 

Mikey curled up in the corner and waited for the human to go away, too frightened to get closer but too intrigued to leave. It sounded like a kid just like him.

 

“I know you're still there. I can hear you breathe and your stomach is growling. It's okay, you can come out. I've got food.”

 

The sound of food made his mouth water and his stomach growl louder. He was so hungry... He hadn't eaten anything since lunch yesterday. The voice sounded kind so he risked it and crawled until he was positioned under the grate.

 

“I knew it!” Mikey nearly ran off at that. “Sorry! I didn't mean to scare you. You look like... a turtle?”

 

“I _am_ a turtle.” He answered back in a tiny voice. He could make out the silhouette of the owner of the voice and as his eyes got used to the light he saw a freckled face with large blue eyes. _Like me._ Her face was surrounded by messy red hair that looked like a ring of fire with the light illuminating her from behind. He couldn't stop staring and didn't notice she had said something else. “What did you say?”

 

“I uh... nothing. I was just surprised you could talk.”

 

“Of course I can talk.” He answered a little offended. “I'm not a _baby_.” The last words hurt him as he was reminded of why he was there and he sniffled again, his tears welling up in his eyes.

 

“My name is April. Are you stuck down there? Need help getting out?” The child asked him.

 

He shook his head. “No, I...” He wasn't supposed to go up to the surface or show himself to humans... or talk to them. He swallowed what he was going to say. “My name is Michelangelo, Mikey. I'm lost.” He said instead.

 

“Need help getting home? I can help! Do you know your address or your parents' phone number?”

 

“I don't have those things.” He answered truthfully and the human frowned at how sad he sounded.

 

“Are your mom and dad looking for you? Maybe I can help you find them.”

 

He shook his head again. “I don't have a mom.” Donnie had explained that to him with exasperated sighs when he'd asked him about it one night, interrupting his work. He'd also explained something else. “And Master Splinter isn't my real dad.” He inhaled a broken breath. “He doesn't want me any more.”

 

“I don't have a mom either...” The child paused, sharing the little turtle's sadness for a moment as it grew darker. The silence was cut of by a gasp. “I know! You could come home with me! Then neither of us will be alone!”

 

“I could?” The little turtle lifted his tearful eyes at the human.

 

“Yeah! My home is right there. It's warm and there's food, we can play together and be best friends forever.” She continued hopefully, her excitement contagious to the small turtle who was now standing up on his tip toes and holding onto the grate.

 

He'd never had a best friend, or any friend, for that matter. He looked back into the dark silent tunnels and made a decision. “Okay, but you have to help me lift the cover,” he pointed in the direction of the nearest manhole cover. “And help me get there without anyone else seeing me.”

 

“Okay!”

* * *

Kirby O'Niel heard the door open and close and small feet run up the stairs. “April?” He called out.

 

“It's me, Dad. I'll be down in a minute.” Her small voice echoed from her room.

 

He sighed in relief when he didn't hear any sadness in her tone. He picked up some discarded birthday party hats and tossed them in the bin. Today had been a specially painful day for both of them. This morning April had been crying for her mother, it was her first birthday without her. He missed her too, _so much_ , and sometimes he didn't know what to do about her little girl's pain when he was drowning in his own. He could barely carry his own grief with him while continuing on with his life trying to find a new normal.

 

If it weren't for his daughter he wasn't sure he could be strong enough to go on as he was, trying to find happiness in little things again if only to point them out and try share them with her. He felt he had failed her today though. She had cried when she blew out her candles as someone told her to make a wish. He was pretty sure he knew what that wish was. The rest of the children had been silent and when her quiet tears turned into strangled sobs they had stared at her. She ran out of the house leaving everyone else behind.

 

He had followed her to find her sitting in the street that went to the fire escape of the house right at the corner and after trying to get her to talk and come back inside he decided to leave her for a moment while he said goodbye to the guests, cutting the celebration short. He thought he'd have to go back out to get her and was surprised when she came running back on her own, clearly feeling better only 20 minutes later.

 

Small footsteps padded down the steps and walked into the kitchen. “Is there any birthday cake left?”

 

“Sure honey, are you all right?” He asked as he pulled the cake out of the fridge and a began cutting her a chocolaty slice.

 

“More, a little more, okay yeah that's okay.” She waited as he cut a fifth of the cake and plopped it on a plate. He wasn't going to reprimand her even if she didn't eat most of it and then didn't want any dinner. On her birthday his little princess could eat all the cake her heart desired. “I'm great, Dad. My wish worked!”

 

“What wish was that, honey?”

 

“Well,” She fished out two spoons from the drawer. “First I wished for Mom to come back,” her face contorted slightly in pain and he put a hand on her shoulder, rubbing gently, “but, but then I asked that if she couldn't then maybe she could send me a friend who could understand me so I wouldn't be alone.”

 

“Oh, honey...” He put the plate on the table and pulled her into a tight hug. She whimpered sadly and buried her face into his sweater for a moment before pulling away and smiling softly. Sometimes he wondered if she wasn't the strongest of the two and comforting _him_. He knew how hard it was for her. The other children didn't really understand her loss and had started to shun her because she wasn't fun and sad all the time. They didn't understand that these things take time and leave a permanent hole in you, reshaping who you are. “You made a friend?”

 

“Yeah! His name is Mikey and he's eight and he lost his mom AND his dad. He was lost because his new dad, who isn't his real dad, abandoned him and doesn't want him anymore. I told him he could stay here. Can he? He can, right Dad?”

 

Kirby tried to follow her fast explanation keeping his growing shock to himself as he realised what she was saying. “Wait, he's here?”

 

“Yeah, he's in my room. I told him he could have some cake.”

 

Kirby looked up to the stairs in the direction of her room. “Can I meet him first?”

 

“Uhm...” April shifted from one foot to the other. “There's something else you should know about him.” She leaned into her dad and motioned for him to come closer as she looked around. “He isn't human, at least not completely. He's a turtle boy.”

 

Kirby straightened and looked at his daughter, expecting to find that she was joking but she was looking at him with pleading eyes. She also was a bit too old for imaginary friends. His psychologist's mind conjured up a bunch of terrifying disorders and questions he needed to ask in order to discard them but instead he asked. “Really?”

 

She nodded vigorously. “Yeah! I couldn't believe it myself either. I heard someone crying and when it was coming from the grate in the pavement I thought maybe a kid had fallen down in there or something but it was a turtle boy!”

 

“In the sewer?”

 

“Yeah! That's where he used to live. Somewhere in the sewers, but he can't go back to his home anymore.”

 

“Because his parents are dead and his adoptive father doesn't want him any more?”

 

“I'm not sure it was his adoptive father, he calls him 'Master'. It's so weird.”

 

Kirby's mind was spinning, he was beginning to get worried about the complexity of her delirium. “Can I see him?”

 

“Okay...” April started walking to the stairs but turned around as she took a few steps. “But you have to promise you won't scare him, or hurt him or send him away, okay?”

 

“Okay...” He answered carefully.

 

“Promise?”

 

“Promise.”

 

He followed his daughter up the stairs with trepidation. She opened her door carefully and walked inside, looking around the empty room. Kirby frowned and started thinking of how he was going to talk to his daughter about what was happening to her.

 

“Mikey?” She called out to the room. “It's okay Mikey, I told my dad about you and he says you can stay. He wants to meet you and said it's okay to have cake before dinner. We can eat as much as we want. Mikey?”

 

Kirby opened his mouth, getting ready to talk to her when the closet door began opening and he gaped. There _was_ someone there. A little blue-eyed boy stepped out. _Not a boy. That's not a boy!_ His heart rate sped up in fright and he reached for his daughter. That was definitely NOT human.

 

“Stay where you are.” Kirby said and his voice seemed to be coming from someone else as he watched the creature stop and look at him fearfully with big teary eyes. He pulled his daughter to him. “Don't come any closer.”

 

“Dad! You promised you wouldn't scare him! You're scaring him!” To Kirby's horror she squirmed out of his grip and ran to the creature, throwing her arms around him in a hug. “It's okay, Mikey, don't be scared,” she comforted him and the little turtle curled into his daughter's embrace, “he's just surprised, is all. Right, Dad?”

 

He was silent for a moment as everything seemed to take on the consistency of a dream. “Wh-what?” He pointed at the child hugging his April.

 

“I already told you. He's a turtle boy!” She turned to face her father and the little turtle clung to his daughter's arm, hiding partially behind her, holding her hand with a large three-fingered one of his own. He looked frightened and sad. He was only a small child probably no older than six by his size. “Mom sent him to me, Dad. She made my wish come true.”

 

Kirby sank to his knees with her words. _Claire, did you?_ He regarded the child carefully for what seemed like a long while. The turtle, Mikey, kept looking from him to April with frightened tears rolling down his cheeks. He didn't seem dangerous. He had a freckled face and large blue eyes, like his daughter and her mother. The way he looked reminded him of the night he had told April her mother was gone. He held out a hand to the boy, deciding to go with these strange events. “Mikey, is it? How old are you?”

 

The little turtle boy seemed to calm down immediately at the friendly tone of voice and he gave him a small nod and a shy smile as he walked out from behind April. Without letting go of her hand he reached for Kirby's. “I'm eight!”

 

* * *

The three of them sat at the dinner table. After hearing when was the last time Mikey had eaten anything he decided that they should all have some dinner and then cake. The boy was devouring the spaghetti bolognaise with gusto, his mouth was completely framed by the tomato sauce as he slurped the pasta while April giggled at his antics.

 

“You're getting tomato all over your face!” April laughed.

 

Mikey laughed as well and he licked as much tomato sauce as he could reach with his tongue before he kept eating. Kirby smiled at the child as he reached for a napkin and used it to wipe some off the boy's cheek.

 

“Slow down, Mikey. There's more food, you're going to choke if you don't chew your food.”

 

“I'm sorry.” He blushed and tried to eat more slowly. “It's just so good! I've never had anything like it!”

 

Kirby decided to get the pot with the rest of the pasta as he watched Mikey empty his plate and look at it longingly. The poor child. He didn't understand what kind of father, adoptive or not, would abandon such a sweet boy.

 

There were a few things that set him on edge and he decided not to ask further about it in April's presence. He was worried about what kind of relationship was between an eight year old child and an adult who wanted to be called “Master” instead of “Dad” or why he was teaching such a young child to fight with weapons. He wasn't just teaching them like some parents would put their kids into karate school but “training” them to be ninja, _assassins_. At his young age he already had scrapes, bruises and scars on his body from his “ninja training”. And what kind of eight year old boy didn't know about spaghetti or cake? One with an inhuman father or _master_ , that's who.

 

His eyes went to his daughter who was speaking to Mikey animatedly. He hadn't seen her so happy in a very long time. It's not that she was clinically depressed or anything but mourning does something to people, even children. It tones down their happiness so the smiles might still be there but they're watery and weak and never stay long. Now she was truly shining like she would before her mother passed away. Maybe...

 

_Claire._

 

Maybe there were such things as miracles. Maybe there was some sort of fate that brought this precious child in need of a family to a family in need of some happiness. The direction his thoughts were taking surprised even him. If he were to really believe... If he were to pull this off they'd need to prepare and set things in motion right away. It was too dangerous to keep him here. It was too easy to be discovered by nosey neighbours or by accident and he wasn't going to keep a child locked in a tiny apartment.

 

He couldn't go to the authorities over the mistreatment of the boy either. He knew what they'd do to someone like Mikey even though he was clearly a kind and intelligent child who only wanted to be loved how he deserved. No. They'd take him and use him for experiments, maybe dissect him or torture him. He couldn't allow it. This child needed protecting and he knew what needed to be done to ensure it. He had already started planning to leave the city anyway for a change of atmosphere hoping it would help his daughter and him heal.

 

Having made his decision he rose from the table and cut a huge slice of cake for each of his children.

 

* * *

 

Michelangelo poked his head out from under a warm blanket as he rode in the back of the O'Niel's van a little over a week later. The city lights were long gone and he thought about the family he was leaving behind for a moment. They'd be better off without him, they didn't need or want him and he was only an annoyance to them. Maybe April's mom had really lead his way to find the little girl when he needed somewhere to stay and she needed a friend.  _Or a little brother to play with._

 

They were headed to a place called “The Farmhouse” where Mr. O'Niel told him he'd be able to go outside whenever he wanted and they'd be safe and happy. He listened to April telling him stories about picnics by the river (whatever a picnic was) and fishing in the lake. It sounded amazing.

 

He couldn't think about his other family anymore, this was his family now. This was his new life. Michelangelo O'Niel.

 


	2. I Am Lost

**I Am Lost.**

 

Still listening to Sia and thinking about turtle tots.

 

_Ouch, I have lost myself again._

_Lost myself and I am no where to be found._

_Yeah, I think that I might break._

_Lost myself again and I feel unsafe._

 

Sia – Breathe Me

 

 

Splinter left the room once he had finished tending to his son. Thankfully, the cuts looked a lot worse than they were, even the one on his temple which had bled profusely. He had been worried about blood loss but the boy had woken shortly after he was stitched up and seemed to be fine as he explained to his father what had happened.

 

He sighed. He wasn't sure what to do about his smallest. He understood the child's frustration, he was different to the others, he needed attention constantly and the other boys didn't have the patience needed to handle him. It made Mikey rebellious, trying to receive the attention he was lacking the only way he was certain to get it, by annoying his brothers into action against him. He was the one who provoked most of the fights around the home, mainly with Raphael who had become his favourite target. He was so very easy to provoke.

 

Even though he understood the reason for his child to act this way he couldn't let this go unpunished. He was certain he had had no intention of harming his brother. Maybe he thought Leonardo would end up chasing him thus falling into his game whether he wanted to or not. He needed to make him understand some way how dangerous this had been. He had to help his son find another way to interact and share time with his brothers. Perhaps he should intervene and add more “group exercises” into their training. Yes, that sounded like a good idea. He could probably come up with some training that could double as team building games to help them spend time with each other cooperating instead of competing. He'd think about it tonight. But first, he would have to talk to Michelangelo and come up with a punishment. Maybe he could help him take care of Leonardo while he was still recovering and take over his chores until he was well enough.

 

He headed to the living room to call his other sons over. Two of them were talking worriedly and looked at him with frightened eyes when he walked into their line of sight. “Where's Michelangelo?” They both straightened and looked down, their eyes were full of tears. “Leonardo is recovering, he is resting now you can see him in a little while, do not worry.”

 

“Sensei!” Donatello spoke his title through a sob and he pulled them both to him to try comfort them as they shook.

 

“Shhh, it's okay. It looked a lot worse that it was. Leonardo will be fine, he only needs rest.”

 

“No!” Raphael pulled away from him. “It's Mikey! He's gone.”

 

“What do you mean? Where is your brother?” Splinter answered more seriously.

 

They looked at each other and whimpered. Donatello broke into pitiful sobs as he buried his face into his robes, clinging to him. He was having trouble making anything out of his muffled words as he tried talking through his cries. He gently pulled him away with his hands on his shoulders and knelt down in front of him.

 

“W-we, yelled at him f-for h-urting Leo a-and,” he swallowed a whimper, “h-he ran away.” He pointed to the makeshift entrance of their home.

 

“He isn't round the corner where he sometimes hides when he cheats at ninja hide and seek.” Raphael tried to sound composed but his small voice cracked and he wiped his eyes angrily with a fist trying to not look as scared and terrified as he probably felt. “We're sorry! We didn't mean to-”

 

“When did this happen?” Splinter asked, trying to take a calming breath. It was probably fine, his son might have just gone a little further to escape his brothers' ire and his inevitable lecture knowing he was in trouble.

 

“When you took Leo to the infirmary.” Donatello answered with a tiny, uncertain voice.

 

Splinter froze, carefully keeping his expression neutral to avoid alarming them. That was hours ago. “I will go find him.” He said calmly. “He is most likely a little further away where you are not allowed to go. Can I trust you two to stay here and be good while your brother is resting?” They both nodded. “Good. I will be back soon.”

 

He walked past the turnstiles and once he was round the corner took off at a run, smelling the air trying to track the way his son had left. He caught a whiff here and there but in some areas where there was running water he'd lose the trail and have to try several different tunnels before retracing his steps to try find it again. Panic was rising within him as he searched further and further from home with no results.

 

He began calling out his son's name after hours of search brought up nothing, not caring if he alerted any humans. He could see the sky beginning to light with the coming sunrise through the grates. He needed to head home and make sure his other children were well. Maybe Michelangelo had wandered back when he was hungry. Yes, that was probably what had happened. He should have checked home sooner.

 

With that thought in mind he headed home, trying to banish the visions of his child falling to his death running through a dark tunnel and not noticing the tunnel had a vertical drop, or falling into the water, the current dragging him underground and drowning him, or humans finding the wandering mutant child and taking him away from him forever. No. He shook himself. He'd check his home first in case he went back and if not he'd head out again and search more thoroughly and systematically.

 

* * *

Mikey watched the rain from April's dark room. He was dry, warm, and full of spaghetti and cake. It was a feeling he didn't remember having before, specially not on rainy days. Rainy days meant damp and cold. They usually mean that Master Splinter couldn't find as much food when he went out scavenging. Such heavy rain ruined food, washing away the algae from the nearby reservoir and drowning the worms.

 

When it rained many days in a row they'd have to ration the food and Splinter wouldn't eat with them. “I am not hungry right now, I will eat later.” Some times even after he had eaten his part his stomach still hurt from hunger and he'd cry until he could fall asleep at night from that horrible feeling.

 

He had asked Mr. O'Niel if they had to save food now that it had started raining and the adult had looked at him carefully asking questions about it and then hugging him closely. He wasn't sure why but the man looked sad and he liked hugs so he'd returned it, smiling when he saw he'd made Mr. O'Niel look more happy.

 

He wondered if his brothers would like spaghetti and cake as much as he did and then shook his head. They probably hated him now. He could never go back to them, he needed to forget them. They would never forgive him for killing his brother even if it was an accident. He started sniffling and tried to be more quiet to not wake his friend who was bundled up in the bed they had been sharing.

 

Mr. O'Niel had asked him about his family and he tried not to tell him too much. He spoke of Master Splinter but not what he was or that he had other turtle brothers. He wouldn't give them away, it wasn't their fault he'd had to run away. That life was over and now he was a different person. If he told them what he'd done and why he ran away they probably would send him away from here as well. It would be his secret, forever.

 

“Mikey?” Mikey jumped at the voice and tried to be really quiet. His brothers never liked when he woke them up.

 

“Mikey, are you awake? Can't you sleep?”

 

“No.” He said miserably. Sometimes he could crawl in beside Leonardo when he couldn't sleep and he wouldn't say anything. He tried to breathe in softly but it came out too loud and shakey. He heard the ruffle of bed covers and the pat of bare feet on carpet before he saw April illuminated in askew yellow pyjamas by the glow of the street lamps outside.

 

She climbed onto the window seat beside him. “It's okay to be sad. My dad told me so. I won't get mad at you if you wanna cry or be sad.” She pulled the little turtle to her and he buried his nose into her soft hair. “I will hug you when you're sad and you can hug me when I'm sad. Okay?” Mikey nodded. He could do that, he liked hugs, he was good at them. He had made Mr. O'Niel happy with one earlier.

 

“Aren't you cold?” Mikey nodded again as an answer. “Come on, the bed is warm. You don't have to sleep if you don't want to.”

 

He climbed back in after her, surrounded by softness and her scent. It was wonderful. They cuddled up together and she talked to him in whispers about school and the games they could play together all weekend until they fell asleep.

 

* * *

Eight weeks had passed and Mikey was still no where to be found. Donatello peeked into the dojo to look at his father. Master Splinter was still searching but he knew that the chances of finding him alive were close to zero. With no food or drinkable water there was no way Mikey could survive on his own and if he'd gone up to the surface to look for these things chances were that he'd been captured and would never come home. _If he's alive at all._ Donatello thought.

 

The most probable scenario was that he'd been washed away in the sudden floods the tunnels were prone to when there were torrential rains as there had been the first couple weeks of his disappearance. Even their home had been flooded, the water reached the living room past the sacks of sand his father had placed at the entrance.

 

Donatello watched his father kneeling in front of the small shrine built for his human family. His head was bowed low over his lap where he held the padded wooden nun-chucks his brother had started training with. He had padded them himself after his little brother had kept getting bruises and bumps from practice. His father had disapproved at first but he'd done it anyway and when Mikey had been happier during training, Master Splinter hadn't brought it up again.

 

He turned and left when Master Splinter's shoulders started shaking.

 

Donatello climbed up on the bench in their living room and hugged his legs. Leonardo and Raphael watched him and sat beside him but didn't say anything. This was all his fault, he shouldn't have yelled at Mikey. He was mean to his little brother and made him run away. At that moment he'd been glad to watch his face turn from angry to terrified. Mikey never seemed to understand how much he hurt the others when he would provoke fights and anger them only for his amusement. _Not for his amusement, he only wanted someone to play with._ He always felt he was being punished unfairly and Donatello had thought that he needed to scare him and make him understand how bad he'd been. He shouldn't have, though. Mikey never did these things on purpose. If only he had played with Mikey when he asked him...

 

“Is Master Splinter going to go out to look for Mikey again?” Leonardo asked. They'd seen him come from the dojo to check. They weren't allowed in the dojo without express permission and his direct supervision any more.

 

“No.” Donatello answered, not giving any other explanation.

 

“Why not?” Raph asked, angry at his silence.

 

Donatello looked away from him and closed his eyes. Couldn't they understand? Didn't they realise what was happening? Did he have to spell it out for them?

 

“I said. Why. Not?” Raph growled through his teeth, annoyed and frustrated at being ignored. He yanked Donatello off the bench when he wouldn't answer. He had tears in his eyes.

 

“Mikey's dead, Raph.” Donnie answered numbly watching Raphael's teary eyes widen with his words.

 

Raph let him go immediately and he sunk back against the bench. “W-wha?”

 

“He doesn't mean it.” Leo answered quickly as he put his hand on a shocked Raphael, his tears streaming freely down his face now as he gaped as his brother. “You don't mean it, right? Tell him you don't mean it, Donnie.” But Donatello only looked away, staring off into the distance.

 

“Shut up!” Raph bellowed when he managed to gather his anger after Donatello's words. He made to grab Donnie again but Leo was in the way. “Don't say that! You're lying! Why do you have to lie about that!?”

 

“What is going on here?” Master Splinter asked in a firm tone that had them all lining up to attention.

 

Raphael's lip trembled as he stepped forward. “Donnie is being mean!” He pointed an accusing finger at his brother. “He said-” He choked on his words. He couldn't say them out loud and only managed a fearful whimper.

 

“Mikey is dead. Isn't he, Sensei?” Donatello asked in that far away tone he was using a lot lately.

 

“Stop!” Raphael cried out. “See? He's lying!” He looked up to his father expecting him to be mad just like he was but he wasn't. Master Splinter was crying. “Sens- Dad?”

 

Master Splinter sunk to his knees and pulled his children close. “I'm sorry Raphael. I couldn't find him and it's been too long.”

 

Raphael struggled against his hold. “No! No, Dad, you can't give up! He's, he's lost out there! He's probably scared and hiding somewhere where you can't find him. You know how scared of the dark he is. Maybe if you call his name really loud...”

 

“I'm sorry, my son.” He whispered pulling him closer. Donatello let himself be held and Leonardo was already crying into his robes.

 

Raphael looked at his brothers with wide eyes, his mouth shaking as he took in what was happening. Master Splinter covered his head with a warm hand when he started wailing, shaking his head, small fists clutching at his fur.

 

That night they all slept together in a little huddle in Master Splinter's room and also the next day and quite a few after that. When they finally returned to their training they saw Mikey's padded wooden nun-chucks on the little shrine by the photos of Master Splinter's human family.

 

* * *

Michelangelo awoke with the sun coming through the window and shining on his face. It warmed his skin and it almost made him bury himself back into the covers but before he had a chance to doze off again he heard running footsteps down the hall and then his door burst open. He bounced against his mattress as April jumped on his bed beside him.

 

“Mikey! Wake up!”

 

He rolled onto his back and smiled at the girl. “Okay.” He said as he yawned and stretched. “What's up?” Within moments he was wide awake as April told him it was warm enough already to go swimming in the lake.

 

“Come on! I'll help you with your clothes.”

 

Mikey groaned. Mr. O'Niel had measured him and bought him clothes to wear before they left the city and he'd had to wear human clothing ever since. They still felt weird and scratchy four years later. He hadn't liked them at all but Mr. O'Niel had insisted that he couldn't go running around naked, specially not outside. He still pulled them off most of the time once he was indoors or in his room, at least his shoes. He hated shoes, shoes were the WORST. His feet were the wrong shape to fit in them comfortably and they always rubbed and squished his toes.

 

“We need to have breakfast, feed the chickens and do some schoolwork before we can go.” April pulled on the shirt that had bunched up at the top lip of his carapace. She stretched it and smoothed it over his shell before standing up to make sure he was dressed properly.

 

“Come on!” She pulled on his hand as he finished tying his laces and they both barrelled down the steps and into the kitchen.

 

“Morning, kids.” A cheery Mr. O'Niel told them as they sat and devoured the pancakes sitting on the table. Michelangelo stuffed a whole pancake in his mouth and started coughing shortly after. Mr. O'Niel walked over to him and pat him firmly on the back. “Always, the same, Mikey. Small bites. The lake will still be there when you're done with your responsibilities.”

 

Mikey nodded and chewed the rest of his food properly, silently racing April as she ate her pancakes just as fast without choking. He shot out of his chair just before she did with an “Ah, HA! I win!” before running outside to the chicken coop. He stepped on a loose shoe lace and nearly tripped, giving April and advantage.

 

“Ha! Slow poke!” She called as she ran passed him.

 

Oh it was so ON! He braced his feet for traction and ran at his full speed. When he reached her he jumped and vaulted over her with a somersault, curling his body and then stretching as he landed in front of her right before the chicken coop with a triumphant whoop.

 

“Mikey!” April called to him and the alarm in her voice made him turn around. “Someone's coming!”

 

He darted into the coop before she said anything else but walked right out again when he saw who it was. “Good morning, Mrs. Morrison!” He called out with a wave of his hand as the car drove up to them.

 

“Good to see you two so lively this morning. Is your father home?” The older woman asked.

 

“Yeah, he's just inside. Want me to go get him?” Mikey answered.

 

“Oh, no, I'll go myself. Don't you bother yourself with it.” She smiled warmly at them and drove along.

 

“I wonder what she wants with Dad.” Mikey said as April scooped some chicken feed out of the sack. She shrugged as the chickens started gathering around them. He watched the woman thoughtfully as she greeted his father and then went inside with him.

 

“Come oooon Mikey! You're wasting time!”

 

Mikey grinned and pulled the chicken feed from her. He twirled and jumped around throwing it about. “Done! Let's go!”

 

April was right, who cared. Today he was finally going to go out to the lake for the first time that year with his sister and his dad to spend the whole day. Maybe they could take a picnic lunch with them. It was going to be awesome.

 

* * *

The three brothers bowed before their sensei until they were called up one by one. Today they would be given their masks and the weapons they had been training with would now be considered their own. After today they would be ninjas. Master Splinter handed each one a different colour mask and waited until they had removed the black one they were using before to tie the new one around their head.

 

Four masks, three brothers.

 

After Donatello had finished tying his, Master Splinter performed the same ritual with the shorter, child sized, orange mask but folded it carefully and placed it on the shrine, adding a pair of real nun-chucks beside the smaller pair with faded orange padding. They all bowed to the shrine and maintained their position for several seconds before rising. Donatello took a little longer.

 

Later they would celebrate their 15th mutation day and maybe they could convince Master Splinter to be allowed to venture above ground. They had talked about this during the weeks leading up to this day. Leonardo was in charge of broaching the subject.

 

* * *

“You really didn't need to come pick me up, Mikey.” April said as they walked down the street headed for home.

 

“It's late and besides I wanted to take a walk. I don't always have an excuse to walk around outside, I'm totally using you as an excuse.” He trudged beside her, hands in the pockets of his over-sized hoodie. April stepped in front of him and pulled the hood down a bit lower to cover his face. She pinched a freckled cheek softly, making him smile and hooked her arm in his before continuing on their way.

 

They had returned to the city at the beginning of the school term. April was attending a good school, Roosevelt High. Aided by Mrs. Morrison who had been teaching them both but preparing her for the difficult entrance exams she had made it in. At first, April was going to go live with her aunt but Michelangelo had argued with their father that he didn't want to be left behind even if that meant he would be cooped up in an apartment most days. “It'll be worth it to keep the family together!”

 

He couldn't say no to that.

 

“It isn't that late. Maybe we could go to this noodle place I found.” April started saying when a van pulled up blocking their path and a bunch of men in suits stepped out and surrounded them.

 

“What the...” Mikey started but April pulled on his arm.

 

“Mikey! They're after you! RUN!”

 

He was about to do as she said but not without her too. They lunged first, knocking him on his shell and grabbing her. They were grabbing HER. “No! April!” He tried to pull the men off her but they were super strong. One of them elbowed him in the temple and it felt as if he had been knocked with a crowbar. He fell back, dazed.

 

“Leave her alone!” An oddly familiar voice shouted and three streaks of green shot passed him and fought against the men.

 


	3. I Am Found

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “We found him.” Raphael whispered to the others and they exchanged glances. “We found him!” He said loudly, his mouth split into a huge grin as tears gathered in his eyes.

 

Michelangelo gaped at the three (or six?) turtles standing in front of him. This wasn't happening. He tried to get up but fell over as he tried to straighten his legs under him from his crouch. Up and down were all wrong, his balance was way off and his head pounded and spun.

 

“Mikey!” He heard his sister's terrified yell and he managed to focus enough to watch her reach out for him as she was pulled into the van, doors slamming and tires screeching as it sped away.

 

“NO!” He yelled back, his arm outstretched as if he could pluck her from their grasp but his eyesight was blackening around the edges. He felt as if he were looking down a long tunnel, the white van in the middle as his vision narrowed and then faded. He fell face down on the ground and didn't move again.

 

“Great! They got away!” Raphael yelled, his back to the human kid on the ground behind him. “What the heck was THAT? It definitely WASN'T ninjustu!”

 

“We need to get out of here.” Leonardo cut off what was about to become a loud rant of epic proportions from his hot-headed brother. He was probably right to complain about their performance but it wasn't the time nor the place for this. They disobeyed a direct order from their father and now they were too exposed. They needed to get underground. Fast. “We made too much noise, someone is bound to have noticed. We need to move.”

 

“We can't just leave him there!” Donatello gestured to the human in the oversized hoodie and sweats laying face down on the sidewalk. The clothing didn't seem to fit him right, he was really wide. He was also wearing strange leather mittens on his hands when it wasn't even chilly. Maybe he was a biker or something? He knelt by the boy deciding what to do.

 

“Don't touch him. We'll anonymously call an ambulance from a payphone and they'll take care of him.” Leonardo said as he tried to pull Donatello back but the other turtle just shook him off.

 

“Come on, Donnie, we're going to get in trouble for what we've already done. Splinter is NEVER going to let us out again if we're seen by another human.” Raph grumbled angrily as he headed towards the alley.

 

“She called him Mikey.” Donnie said quietly and they both froze. “What if he's seriously hurt and needs help now before an ambulance can get here?”

 

The brothers said nothing but didn't move away again. Leonardo knelt by them and nodded giving him silent approval. He understood what Donnie meant by that. _What if their brother had been hurt and someone could have helped him?_ Donatello reached out and put a hand on the boy's back, the other reaching for his neck to find a pulse but he stopped.

 

“Donnie?” Leonardo looked worriedly at his brother's paling face. “Is he...?”

 

“What?” Donnie whispered in a detached voice directed towards the boy. He looked scared.

 

Leonardo was about to pull his brother away thinking he was in shock at finding the human dead but stopped when Donatello rubbed the boy's back and then tapped his palm once sharply against it. “She called him...” Donnie started to say but he sounded so afraid to finish the sentence, to speak the name out loud again.

 

Raphael had come to them and knelt beside them. “What? What is it?” He asked but they knew what he was thinking. They all heard the sound Donnie's palm made against the boy's back. It sounded just like...

 

Donatello turned him over slowly and they all stared. Time seemed to stop when they saw his green, freckled face. “Mikey?” Donnie whispered. He said it so quietly and in such a frightened little voice that he sounded eight again.

 

_It couldn't be._

 

* * *

Thunderstorms in the sewers had been pretty scary. It was one of the only instances where Michelangelo was sure no one would kick him out of their bed if he showed up in the middle of the night. Raph would pretend he was protecting him and complain about him being a scaredy-cat but would hold onto him just as tightly as he held onto Raph. Leo would tell him about the samurai and ninjas in Sensei's books he was reading, distracting both of them from the loud sounds outside with the excuse of lecturing his little brother about the warrior's way.

 

Usually he'd go to Donnie and he'd explain all the sciency stuff about thunder and lightning reassuring him that they were very safe and he believed him until that one time when all the lights went out after a huge BOOM echoed all around them. They'd grabbed on to each other and then run off to their father's room, finding Leo and Raph already there and cowering in his arms. Master Splinter smiled and lifted the covers up, opening his arms to the two little turtles who scrambled into the pile of bodies and were immediately absorbed into the group hug.

 

Mikey held on to April the first night he was at the farmhouse. It had been raining since he had left the sewers and it seemed 100 times worse at the farmhouse where the lightning lit up the sky and the cracks of thunder shook the whole house. They were both very frightened but April was trying to be brave while Mikey squeaked with every sound and trembled against her.

 

After a while their door opened and Mr. O'Niel poked his head around the corner. “Are you kids all right? He asked quietly.”

 

“Daddy!” April cried, and it was all that Mr. O'Niel needed to climb into the bed with them, sandwiching Mikey between them.

 

“I thought maybe it was too loud to sleep and you two would like some bed time stories while we waited for it to calm down. This is almost as bad as having neighbours with their loud music on at night, isn't it?”

 

“Aren't you scared, Daddy?” April asked as her father took out a flashlight and a book and settled into a comfortable position.

 

“Are you afraid of fireworks when we watch them on the 4th of July?” He asked her calmly with a warm smile.

 

Mikey looked up at the question. He'd seen fireworks once. Not in person but on photos in a magazine. They looked amazing. “Are they this loud too?” He asked curiously.

 

“Yes they are, but they're beautiful aren't they?” Both children nodded. “You need to be careful with fireworks just like you need to be careful with lightning. If everything is fine it's really pretty to watch, they are like nature's firework show. Do you want to see?” When they looked at him uncertainly he smiled and laughed good naturedly. “It's all right. It's perfectly safe. Come on, it will by like the 4th of July in spring.”

 

He coaxed them both out of bed, put them in coats and sat in the porch waiting with both children huddled on each side under his arms. Before long, a forked streak arched across the sky twisting and illuminating everything. “Now you have to wait for the clap, sound travels a lot slower than light. I bet this one is going to be suuuper loud!” He exclaimed cheerfully.

 

A few seconds after his words left his mouth they heard the thunder but it wasn't as loud as they had expected. “Awww,” Mr. O'Niel said, disappointed. “I was hoping it would have a bit more kick to it.”

 

The two children giggled as they went on, their fear forgotten, counting the seconds between the flashes of light and the claps of thunder, pointing at the prettier or brighter ones and guessing whether it would be loud or quiet. They covered their ears and laughed with Mr. O'Niel as he did with the loudest ones of all and he explained what a lightning rod was and where they were positioned throughout the town.

 

After a while the storm quieted down and they were all yawning and giggling when it would trigger a yawn in the other. “Okay, time for bed I think.” Mr. O'Niel declared.

 

He tucked them both in their large shared bed and kissed them each after a good cuddle. Mikey suddenly felt completely warm and loved. “Mr. O'Niel?” He asked shyly before he left.

 

“Yes, Mikey?”

 

“Is it okay if I call you 'Daddy' too?”

 

“I would love that, Mikey.” He said as he caressed a freckled cheek. “Sleep well, my children.”

 

* * *

The three brothers gasped when Donatello pulled back the hood to show Mikey's face more clearly. It was definitely him. Donatello opened his mouth to say something but he only managed a strangled cry which he covered quickly with his hand.

 

“We found him.” Raphael whispered to the others and they exchanged glances. “We found him!” He said loudly, his mouth split into a huge grin as tears gathered in his eyes. He shook Donatello who only stared, his hand still covering his mouth as he breathed roughly through his nose. Then he got on his feet and let out a disbelieving laugh to the sky. “We found him!!” He called out to the city in general with his arms up in a triumphant gesture.

 

Leonardo shushed him before leaning forward to touch his long lost brother, making sure he was real. “How is this possible?” He asked in awe, not believing what was right in front of him as he felt his brother's warm plastron rise and fall gently. “Is this a trick?” He directed the question at Donnie who kept shaking his head. Raph and Leo both reached out when Donatello began swaying.

 

“Woah!” Raph caught him as he slumped forward and he pulled Donatello's hand away from his mouth, cradling his face with a large palm. “Donnie, stay with us, okay? We can't have another unconscious turtle on our hands.”

 

Leonardo put a hand on Donatello, squeezing his shoulder, and that seemed to ground him a little. “We need to get him home quickly. We can't stay here any longer, it's too dangerous.”

 

They all looked at each other seriously and nodded. Donatello put his arms under his little brother's shoulders and lifted, Raph took his legs and Leonardo ran in front of them, lifting the manhole cover and helping when they had to clear any obstacles.

 

They reached the part of subway tracks that lead to their home. Thankfully at this hour there were no trains on this line. Donatello could barely see where he was going, he was silently crying, his sight blurring from the tears. The others pretended not to notice as he sniffled quietly while a million possibilities ran through his head and he thought of all the things he could have done to get his little brother back but didn't because he gave up too soon.

 

“I knew he wasn't dead.” Raph voiced their thoughts as they neared the lair. “You never believed me but I always knew he was alive somewhere. We never should have stopped looking.” His happy outburst from before was gone. “I shouldn't have listened to you.” He said to the brothers in general but Donnie knew he meant him.

 

“Stop.” Leonardo ordered as they arrived home and he opened the door to the lab, and made way so they could place their little brother gently on a cot. “He must have been taken by humans.” He touched the clothing covering Mikey's body and then started unzipping the hoodie. “He could have been long gone before Master Splinter stopped looking.”

 

Donatello started helping his brother remove the hoodie with shaking hands. They needed to check him for more injuries. “He had to be. He couldn't have survived in the tunnels on his own that long. They took him.”

 

Once they removed the grey hoodie they let Donatello examine the darkening bruise on the side of his head. The boy was wearing a white shirt with a sun and “Surfer Dude” written on the front of a surf board. The t-shirt exposed his carapace, it was open in the back and was tied behind his neck and behind his hips just under the lip of his carapace. His jeans were low cut and fit snugly under his carapace too. The black leather shoes he wore looked custom made for their wide feet.

 

Leonardo took his hand and noticed the dark leather gloves were three-fingered. He pulled it off gently and looked for the scar on his palm and wrist he knew his little brother had from when they were children. They had been playing where they weren't supposed to and he fell, cutting himself on green glass from a broken bottle.

 

Raphael looked over Leonardo's shoulder and touched the mark that was there. “It's him. It's really him. This isn't a trick, Leo”

 

“We need to tell Master Splinter.” Leonardo said before he rose and walked out towards the dojo where Master Spinter was probably meditating.

 

* * *

Mikey had been missing for four months now and things were still very strange between them. Donnie was acting the strangest of them all. He had been extra reclusive since a few weeks after it happened and was distant with everyone when he wasn't isolated working on his “projects”.

 

“Donnie?” Raph asked tentatively before stepping into the corner of the large area his brother had designated his “workspace”. He had put duct tape on the floor and everything and they weren't supposed to cross into it. Master Splinter had not been happy about it and told him off, removing the tape but Donnie had just stood there with a blank look on his face and put it straight back down when Splinter left him.

 

After that Raphael asked Master Splinter what was wrong with him. “He's like a zombie.”

 

“Your brother is just very affected by the loss of Michelangelo.” Master Splinter answered with a warm paw on Raphael's head.

 

“But he's not sad or anything. He just sits there.” Raphael and Leonardo had spent nights crying into his father's fur and on each other when they missed Mikey too much. They still did on occasion.

 

“Sometimes...” Master Splinter started, choosing his words carefully for an eight year old. “Sometimes one is so incredibly sad and the feeling is so large that one cannot bring themselves to feel anything because they are afraid it would swallow them whole.”

 

Raphael mulled over his words for a long time before deciding to go see his brother. “Donnie?” He asked again as he stepped over the line. Donatello straightened and turned his head slightly, a red-brown eye glancing at him before going back to what he was doing. He didn't say anything so Raph took it as a sign to continue. “What are you doing?”

 

“I'm busy.”

 

“That's okay, I don't want to bug you, I just wanted to hang out.” He crossed over to where Donatello was sitting on the floor, dismantled electronics spread out in front of him and sat down by his brother. “What are you doing? Did you break it?” He pointed to all the bits on the floor. “Why did you ask Master Splinter for this stuff if you're just going to break it?”

 

“You wouldn't understand.” He mumbled and kept doing whatever it was he was doing while Raphael sat silently beside him.

 

He tried to be patient and look for this 'incredible sadness' Sensei was talking about but he got bored quickly. “What's this for?” He picked up a piece Donatello had just placed on the floor in front of him and when he wouldn't answer he put it back, in the wrong place.

 

“Would you stop!” Donatello yelled suddenly, startling Raphael. “This isn't a toy, leave me alone, Mikey!”

 

Raphael had opened his mouth to angrily retort but they both gasped and closed their mouths when they realised what name he'd called out. For a moment neither of them said anything but then Donatello's face contorted and he made an awful sound before dropping what he was working on to cover his face with his hand, the other he used to hug himself.

 

Raphael didn't hesitate, he surged forward and embraced his brother. He started to get frightened, his brother wasn't crying like he usually did when he was hurt or sad. He was making keening noises full of pain, as if someone was stabbing him in the chest which he was now clutching and he couldn't breathe.

 

After a while he pulled himself together, stopped and pushed Raphael away knocking him on his bottom. “Leave me alone.” He whispered harshly. When Raphael didn't move he added, “please...” and he sounded so desperate that he obeyed if only to run to his father and tell him what had happened, afraid for his sibling.

 

Master Splinter appeared from the dojo some time later and asked Raphael and Leonardo to go play in their room. Donatello looked back surprised at his father and then glared at Raph knowing where the betrayal had come from.

 

“What are you working on, my son?” Master Splinter redirected his attention to the electronics he was fiddling with.

 

“I'm almost done.” He assured his father. “I didn't mean to yell at Raph but he was picking up the parts and putting them down in the wrong order!” He probed, looking up at his father to see how much Raphael had disclosed.

 

Master Splinter sighed and sat by his son, trying to think how to broach the subject. He noticed two little green heads quickly darting back behind the corner but decided not to act on it. “What is it?” He gestured to what Donatello was holding again.

 

“I'm making trackers for us, see?” He held up small devices in the shape of mismatched cubes with tiny antennae. “We can carry these or tape them to our shells and then you can use this.” He put the small cubes down and lifted what looked like a modified walkie-talkie. “Then with this you can tell how close or in what direction we are.” He turned the walkie-talkie on and one of the little cubes as well and as he brought them closer together and further apart the walkie-talkie's static noise became louder or quieter. “I still haven't managed to give it much range, it's only about 30 yards at the moment.”

 

Master Splinter pulled the items out of his child's hands and put them down so he could pull him into an embrace without damaging his work. “Thank you, my child.” He said with a broken whisper, and held him tightly as he tried to regain his composure.

 

“I just thought that maybe if we had this then we wouldn't get lost or if we did you could find us...” He said quietly.

 

“My son.” He lifted his son's face to look into his eyes. “Thank you for trying to keep our family safe, but you must know, my bright boy, that Michelangelo's disappearance was never your fault.”

 

Donatello's face twisted into a painful grimace for a fraction of a second before smoothing out into his now more common blank expression. He nodded once stiffly at his father's words.

 

“No, my son. You are not listening.” He held his small face closer to have his full attention so he could see the truth in his eyes. “There was nothing you could do, my child. Michelangelo disappearing was not your fault.”

 

Donatello whimpered, his lips trembling as he tried to defend his position. “B-but I y-yelled at him and s-scared him a-away!” He inhaled sharply and continued. “I sent him away when he wanted to play and he was upset because of it when he went to see Leo. I could have chased after him when he ran or told him to stay but I didn't.”

 

“My boy, you cannot be responsible for the actions of your brother. You cannot be expected to bend to his every wish, at some point you would have turned down his games and you would be in your right to expect he not be violent with his other brothers because of it.” He didn't have to carefully measure his wording with his brightest child. “You do not hold authority over him so I doubt he would have listened to your order and if you would have followed...” Master Splinter shuddered. “Maybe you would have shared his same fate.”

 

Donatello's tears were falling freely now as he listened to his father's words. At first he just shook his head but then he crumpled into him, his father enveloping him easily and lifting his small body to cradle against him. “I am glad you didn't follow him, Donatello. I do not know what I would have done if I lost you as well that day, my son.”

 

“Daddy.” Donatello let out his grief then, it might have been just a glimpse of what he was holding in but it seemed like an avalanche. He was wailing like he hadn't heard him do since he was a baby and it brought his own grief to the forefront, sharing in his son's tears as his small body shook. “Daddy, I'm sorry. I'm so sorry.” He might not be able to convince him he was not guilty of losing his brother but he could at least gather him up in his arms and try soothe his broken sobs and broken heart.

 

He heard tiny sobs coming from the direction of the rooms and he held an arm open in their direction, listening for the pad of little feet as they hurried over and piled on their brother with hugs and teary kisses full of comfort for the one who was now considered the youngest and therefore under their protection.

 

* * *

Donatello's trembling fingers stayed on Mikey's bruised head as if he feared that by not touching him, his little brother would dissipate like a mirage. Master Splinter charged into the lab shortly after, eyes wide and frantic, darting directly to Michelangelo's prone form and then to Donatello as if asking if this were real. Donatello nodded, understanding the message.

 

He rushed to the cot and collapsed beside it when he could clearly see his lost child's face, his hands hovered over him, not daring to touch, probably for the same reason Donatello couldn't pull his own away. For a moment nothing happen and they could have been a scene at a wax museum but then Michelangelo furrowed his brow and groaned softly before blinking slowly.

 

His blue eyes looked up at the light in the ceiling, squinting for a moment before focusing on Donatello, the one closest to his head and his direct field of vision. A look of confusion took over his face, “Where-?” he began and then stopped and really looked at him. “Donnie?”

 

Donatello nodded, giving him a teary smile as he half sobbed and half answered “Uh-huh.” With his nod.

 

“Am I dead?” He asked, still confused and it was too much for Donatello to take. He slid his hand under his little brother's shoulders and pulled him into his arms, sobbing into the side of his head. “Master Splinter?” Splinter's armed surrounded both of them and his cries joined Donatello's.

 

“I knew it.” Raphael said as he sat behind his long lost little brother and put a hand on the top of his head before leaning in to him. “I knew you were still alive.” He said into a t-shirt covered shoulder. Michelangelo was trembling, so he held him a little tighter as he nuzzled him and filled his nostrils with his scent he thought he had forgotten.

 

The mattress dipped again and Michelangelo looked up to see who it was. His breath caught in his throat. “Leo?” He whispered as he pulled away from the others. “Leo!” He launched himself at his brother and only the eldest's ninja training kept them from tumbling to the ground.

 

He caught his little brother and chuckled, blinking his tears away as he tried to keep his mouth in a smile. Michelangelo was sobbing into him and he held him carefully as the others latched onto him again. “I thought you were dead, I thought I had killed you. Leo! I'm so sorry, Leo!” He wailed.

 

The little family, whole once more, held onto each other until they calmed down enough to speak. They slowly separated, without completely letting go. “My child, what happened?”

 

“Did humans take you?” Leonardo asked, gesturing at his clothing.

 

“I ran away. I thought I couldn't come back, no one would want me after I...” He looked at Leonardo sadly. “I'm sorry.”

 

“My child.” The sorrow was thick in Master Splinter's voice but he smiled at his son softly. “Even if the accident had been fatal we would never have wanted you to leave.”

 

I was lost,” Michelangelo started again and lowered his eyes, guilt and grief written all over his face. “for a couple days. I was hungry and I couldn't find my way back. A girl heard me and offered me cake. I went with her.” He closed his eyes, expecting to be yelled at for his stupidity. He had always joked with April about her luring little brothers with cake when they were older. It didn't seem so funny any more. “I'm sorry.”

 

Raphael sat back and looked blankly out into the distance. “So there was nothing to find after two days.” He said bewildered. It was more of a statement than a question and nobody answered.

 

“Did they hurt you?” Master Splinter asked, looking into his son's eyes for any hint of deceit.

 

Michelangelo shook his head. “No, they took me in but we left the city a week later and I grew up in Northampton on a farm away from other people. I didn't come back from Massachusetts until a month ago.” His eyes darted back and forth as he considered all the things he needed to tell them.

 

“Master Splinter! The girl I was with! April!” He shot up from the cot and held out his arms as a wave of dizziness overcame him. “We need to get her back! They took her! I think it was because of me, we need to find her!” He exclaimed, holding onto Master Splinter who looked at him with confusion.

 

“Perhaps you should explain to me what happened from the beginning.” He looked at his sons and pulled Michelangelo back down to sit on the cot.

 

Leonardo stood to attention under his father's stern look. “Well, Sensei, we were out minding our own business when Donnie saw this red-headed girl.”

 

TBC

 


	4. I Might Break

“And now we have to get April back!” Mikey interjected when Leonardo reached the part of his explanation where the men in suits pushed her into a van.

 

“You were walking down the street in plain sight for all to see?” Master Splinter addressed his son, failing to hide the alarm in his voice.

 

Michelangelo stopped what he was about to say and looked at himself for a moment. “Well, I wasn't... I mean... yes, but,” he looked around as he pat down his shirt, noticing he was missing a glove, “I was covered up, I had a hoodie on.” At everyone's incredulous look he added. “You'd be surprised how little humans look at each other when they're walking down the street at night. Just have to act casual. It's all in the walk.”

 

There was silence in the room as they watched him find and pull his glove on and then wrap himself up in the large hoodie, zipping it up to his chin before covering his head with the hood and spreading his arms in a 'tadaa' motion.

 

When no one said anything after a while he lowered his arms slowly and looked sheepishly at the floor before clearing his throat. “So, uhm... when are we going to go look for April?”

 

“Maybe this is something better left to the police.” Leonardo started saying but before Michelangelo could complain Donatello interrupted.

 

“I don't think that's an option. We can't let the police get in on this. If they were after Mikey it means they already knew of his existence and have been targeting him, planning an abduction. We don't know who these people are, they might be working for the government. If we give the police access to his family they'll just have free reign for their ultimate goal and if they're not working for the government, their investigation could reveal Mikey's existence.” He gestured to Michelangelo who bowed his head, shadows covering his face as he fisted his hands.

 

Donatello drifted toward his computer before continuing. “I'm not so certain their target was Mikey though.” His hands darted over the keyboard and his brothers crowded behind him to watch as his typing brought up and minimised different windows in quick succession. “They barely even looked at him. They dived straight for the girl, uh, April. They didn't even try to immobilize him and he was down and unresisting after they struck him in the head. It would have been easy to pull him into the van as well.”

 

Michelangelo pressed against his carapace and Donatello paused when he felt a hand on his shoulder as the other pointed at the screen in front of him. Mikey's cheek was practically brushing his as he exclaimed. “The van! Donnie, you're a genius. You remembered the plates!”

 

Donatello didn't answer straight away, soaking in the affection his brother gave him so easily as if time hadn't passed, as if he hadn't driven his little brother away from the family, scaring him into running from them, into believing he wasn't wanted here any longer. He swallowed thickly as he tore his wide brown eyes from Mikey trying to pull his voice out from the murky waters of his guilt and failing. He nodded mutely and continued typing, images of the van from different angles popping up on screen.

 

“That logo! I've seen it before.” Mikey continued, oblivious to his brother's discomfort as he stretched his neck out further. “There's a building by April's school that has it on the door. We should go check it out! Donnie, you're the best!” Mikey hugged his brother from behind, squeezing him fiercely as he pulled him back against him.

 

Donatello lifted a hand slowly but before he could touch his brother's arm he'd pulled away. He closed his eyes and tried to calm the storm inside him. Taking a calming breath he schooled his features and rose to join the conversation the others were having behind him as they made a plan to recover the girl who had taken Mikey from them seven years ago.

 

* * *

 

The sunlight filtered through the clear lake water and rippled over Michelangelo as he watched the bubbles rise to the surface. He had always loved swimming but there wasn't much you could do when the only water available for that purpose was what you could fill the bathtub with. It was still fun to slosh around and dive in the tub but as they got older and larger it just wasn't the same any more.

 

He dove deeper where it was darker near the lake's bottom. It was green and murky here, there were things growing as if it was an underwater secret meadow for fish. ' _And turtles_ ' He added in his head as he swam among the larger rocks, poking at something that looked like a broken barrel.

 

He turned his head as he saw a glint of silver speed away in the corner of his eye. Covering his mouth as a laugh and more bubbles escaped him he shot towards it, pushing back the water with hands and feet as he accelerated, twisting around as several fish darted to the side and away from him, the sunlight glinting off their iridescent scales. He chased them around for a while trying to follow their movement and lightning fast reactions to him. At one point he was so close he could almost touch them so he sped up and reached out with his fingers to brush over the tail of one of them before it skittered off.

 

Considering that enough of a win in his impromptu game of tag-the-fish he waved his hand in the direction of his silvery playmates before turning and making his way back in languid strokes, feeling the water slide over his skin and letting his toes brush over the muddy sand to leave murky brown clouds in his wake. He headed for the shore and the big rock where he could see April's silhouette against the bright sky as she sat on the edge, feet moving back and forth lazily in the water.

 

He stopped moving, closing his eyes and letting himself drift suspended in the liquid as he floated slowly to the surface where the warmth of the sun's rays penetrated the cool water and his skin. He'd been holding his breath for quite a while now so he let the tip of his snout break the surface, just enough to allow his nostrils open and inflate his lungs, keeping the rest of his body submerged.

 

His own breathing sounded loud in his ears, echoing all around him and he was focused on it when something warm covered a nostril, making him jerk down under water quickly, retracting his head slightly into his shell on instinct before a happy chime made him open his eyes. April's face was close, smiling brightly at him. Her laugh was distorted by the water but still sounded wonderful and he couldn't resist laughing back even though it made him expel his breath and have to come up for air.

 

For a while they just looked at each other as they tried to control their giggles. There wasn't really a reason for it. No one had said or done anything truly funny that warranted their reaction. Their laughter died down as April reached out to him and traced his features with her fingers, along a ridge, over his eye which he closed in a slow wink and then giggling again as he snorted when she tickled his nose.

 

“You're like a crocodile floating in the lake! I thought you were going to nibble my feet!” She laughed when he opened his mouth wide and floated towards her pink toes still dipped in the water. “Nooooo!”

 

“Raaaaar!” He mock-growled but when she held him back with a palm planted on his forehead as he opened and closed his mouth he reached under the water with a finger and tickled the soft sole of her feet making her squeal and pull back. He surged forward making “omnomnom” noises as she tried to keep her feet away from his grasp.

 

“I hear we've got some hungry crocodiles to feed, hmmm?” Mr. O'Niel laughed as he approached them. He spread a striped blanket on the ground and started pulling out sandwiches from a basket. April got up and held a hand out for Mikey who accepted the help to climb over the rock and let himself be pulled towards food.

 

Later, dry and with a full stomach he lay stretched out and face down on the blanket warmed by the afternoon sun as he listened to the wind rustling the leaves. His mind floated as his body had in the water, soothed by the heat permeating his skin. A cool hand roused him slightly and he peered through a heavy eyelid as April's inquisitive fingers followed the whorls on his carapace and then down the leathery freckled skin of his arm before squirming into the palm of his large hand and curling around his fingers.

 

“I'm so glad I found you, little brother.” She sighed as she lay back beside him to nap as well.

 

In Mikey's sleep-fogged mind he imagined the voice coming from an unhurt forest-green elder brother who had spent the day with him, forgetting his katas to play tag the fish and discover the secrets in the bottom of a mysterious lake and it was his blue eyes that blinked at him sleepily by his side as they lay basking in the sun.

 

* * *

“I should be with them.” Michelangelo said miserably as he sat by his father in the kitchen staring at the cup of steaming tea in his hands. He never liked tea much but he decided not to say anything. He didn't want to hurt Master Splinter's feelings.

 

“You are not trained, my son. I fear you would only hinder their mission” Michelangelo bowed his head lower, the hood casting his face in shadows. “It is not your fault, my child.” He continued as he gently tugged the hood off his son's head and lifted his chin so he'd meet his eyes. “In the meantime maybe you could tell me more about what happened after you went missing.”

 

“I...” Michelangelo hesitated, “I don't know where to start.” He glanced up uncertainly at Master Splinter.

 

“Is your human... family,” he struggled with the word, unsure of how to name the people Michelangelo had lived with these past seven years, “... kind to you?”

 

“Yeah.” Michelangelo answered softly. “April is my sister and Mr. O'Niel is... he's...” He swallowed when his voice cracked and he couldn't continue. He glanced up at Master Splinter with tearful, guilty eyes. “He's my...”

 

“Your father.” Master Splinter finished for him slowly and Michelangelo bit his trembling lip and nodded, turning away as the first tears fell.

 

“I'm sorry.” He whispered.

 

Master Splinter closed his eyes and breathed slowly to calm the twist in his stomach. He tried to bury his hurt at hearing his son call someone else father. ' _It is petty to feel betrayed because of this._ ' Until less than an hour ago his son was dead, he should be grateful. If it had been someone less forgiving perhaps he would have really been lost to them forever.

 

“Don't be.” Master Splinter said as he placed a hand on his child's shoulder. “I am glad someone loving found you and accepted you in their family. It is probably the only reason why we were able to be reunited, my son.”

 

He tugged gently and Michelangelo quickly stumbled into his arms, burying his face in his brown robe. When he was calmer he pulled him gently away. “Let me look at you, my child, you have grown so much. You must tell me all about your human family and everything about you I've missed all these years.” He said with a warm smile that Mikey immediately returned, bright-eyed and happy. Michelangelo might have grown up and changed without him to witness it but he'd recognize that smile anywhere.

 

He listened as Mikey told him of the farmhouse and the chickens, about swimming in the lake and meeting Mrs. Morrison who then home schooled him and his sister. Master Splinter didn't flinch when he heard about Mikey coming to the city to be with his family and he smiled warmly when he was told how much Mikey had missed them all.

 

* * *

Hamato Yoshi's turtle children were actually the same age or at least close enough that it did not matter one way or the other. He did not know, nor did he care if they were from the same clutch or not but even if they were they had always been very different from one another and not only physically.

 

As they grew up and began understanding the world around them they had established a sort of hierarchy amongst themselves. When they were young Leonardo had always been the largest of the four and therefore considered himself eldest and responsible for the others. Even if he hadn't been, it was in his nature to protect his siblings the best a child could, and often times he would get in between fights trying to maintain the peace between unruly brothers.

 

Donatello was the second largest but acquiesced his spot easily to Raphael as he didn't think it mattered either way at the time and ended up in third place by default. He was surprised at times when Raphael took his position to heart and found himself being fussed over by his smaller brother.

 

Mikey didn't need to be told to know he was the youngest. He had always been the smallest (though not by much) and most needy of attention and affection. He would be sick most often and had to be watched and taken care of while the others were gaining more responsibilities. Nobody really blamed him for it, they usually enjoyed the opportunity to feel more adult and take care of someone except when they didn't. They were still children after all.

 

Fights were commonplace in a household with four so very different personalities. They would argue over toys, attention and personal space. As they collected more personal items they found out that the easiest way to avoid conflict was to colour code their belongings. There were also things that were necessarily of common use and shared, sometimes begrudgingly, between them.

 

At first, an initial scrawled or etched on certain toys, plates and other household items was enough to show who it belonged to, but as time went on and their house filled up with more items they found they could pick and choose between things they kept scavenging and they each began to prefer certain colours to identify their possessions. Leo and Raph would argue about both of them wanting the blue one or the red one (fire trucks didn't really come in blue and police cars never had much red on them). They didn't really stick to a single colour, there wasn't that much of a broad choice amongst the refuse to be so picky but when they could choose they had their own tendencies.

 

Mikey was the only brother who took the colour coding to heart as if someone had been placing orange items in front of him as little gifts meant only for Mikey because they were in “his colour”. Maybe he wasn't very good when it came to reading or learning maths but he was creative and turned everything into a game. That piece of orange plastic wrap? Cut out some cardboard rings attached with string and they became super x-ray goggles! A bit of orange rope? Looped on one end and weighted on the other with a broken tennis ball it's an ankle jump rope! You could keep the red fire truck, thankyouverymuch. This bit of orange plastic looks just like a boat to play with during bath-time, don't you think?

 

When Master Splinter had first given them their practice weapons he had told them they were not to mark them in any way. Even if they were only practice weapons they had to be treated with utmost respect and care and were not toys to be personalized or modified in any way, but when Donatello decided to pick a cloth to pad Mikey's nun-chucks he took the extra time to search for something orange.

 

Master Splinter had given Donatello a stern look that morning when they arrived at practice and he noticed the modified wooden practice weapons in his hands. He knew Michelangelo had been struggling with their new training, it was a difficult weapon to master after all and with their weapons practice added onto the end of their regular martial arts and meditation he knew his youngest had been feeling frustrated at his lack of improvement and the numerous bumps on his head and arms.

 

His moment of hesitation gave Donatello enough time to present them and the reaction was immediate. Michelangelo beamed, happier than he'd been at practice for a very long time, jumping up and kissing his brother loudly before hugging his weapons tightly to him. Donatello ducked his head with an embarrassed blush and tilted smile when Master Splinter approached and held out his hand to examine them.

 

Mikey hurriedly handed them over telling him how awesome they were and how he had the best brother in the world. It was hard for him not to smile at his enthusiasm as he turned them over in his hands, examining Donatello's handiwork carefully. His brightest child held himself straight with his arms behind his back, no doubt ready to defend his actions when questioned but Master Splinter only nodded and handed them back. They were very well modified: the padding wasn't too thick or heavy and was wrapped tightly by the cloth. Michelangelo staying a bit longer after their training was done to practice a couple moves on his own convinced Master Splinter it was the right decision and the rules could be bent on this occasion.

 

Over a year later Donnie stood in the empty dojo, staring at the padded nun-chucks placed on the shrine. He supposed this was one reason why the weapons shouldn't be marked or personalised. No one would ever use them again. All of the weapons and some equipment they used themselves for practice had probably belonged to other Hamato Clan students at some point. Master Splinter brought them from Japan when he was still a human along with all the other weapons that hung on the racks on the wall and the other more delicate items and practice weapons he kept put away in some dusty chest in his room.

 

They were a piece of Mikey now, the only part of him they had left. He'd seen Raph whispering to them sometimes when he thought no one was around to see him. He'd even caught Leo pressing his hands together and bowing. It wasn't anything new, he'd done that sort of thing before to show his respects to Sensei's family but now it was done more often and his eyes never strayed from the bright cloth.

 

Donatello left a piece of himself in them too, a part of him that disappeared with Michelangelo and those useless pieces of wood wrapped in orange fabric represented all he'd lost that day. They would be there to remind him of the part he'd played, of his guilt. He wouldn't do something so pointless as pray to them or talk to them like his brothers or father did. He knew better. No one was listening. No one would hear the words or offer forgiveness and yet he sometimes felt pulled to this spot in front of them as he was now.

 

The soft scrape of wood startled him as Master Splinter opened the shoji door leading to his rooms. He turned away from his questioning glance and left to the kitchen where his brothers were probably setting the table for dinner. He wasn't in the mood for another lecture on spirituality or superstitions Master Splinter had been trying to have with him. For some reason he seemed to think that if he talked to bits of wood on a shrine it would make everything okay again. It was ridiculous.

 

He sat down in the kitchen as Leonardo placed chopsticks on three sides of the table leaving the place by Donatello's side empty. Something else that was now useless; no one would sit in Mikey's place at the table even if it would make more sense. Sensei at the head of the table didn't have any leg room and had to lean forward uncomfortably but no one would take his place. It was as if it were occupied by a ghost, like his room that was still mostly as he had left it.

 

It was silly though, ghosts didn't exist and there were no such things as spirits that inhabited the places or items that belonged to someone who'd passed away. They just didn't need it for storage or had any other use for it anyway. Donatello had tidied it up during the few days just after Mikey had gone missing, believing that at any moment he would return and would want to rest in a freshly made bed. While he was at it he'd put away toys, straightened bookshelves, organized colouring material, and even swept the floor. Part of it had been to quell his anxiety as each day passed and there was still no sign of him and part of it had been to try redeem his mistake, an apology of sorts. It had been for nothing though. How silly it was to think that tidying a bedroom could be apology enough for scaring your brother away from home and ultimately causing his death.

 

His shoulders slumped at the thought and he stared at his lap until Raphael started handing him bowls to spread around the table. He wasn't sure if they had said anything while he'd been thinking, Leonardo was looking at him oddly but he was easily ignored. His older brother opened his mouth just as a loud snap made them both jump.

 

“Aww, my cup!” Raphael held his red cup out showing a vertical line where it had cracked as he'd tried to pull it out from inside another cup.

 

“How did you manage that? You need to be more careful we don't have that many left.” Leonardo chastised as Raphael scowled at him.

 

“I didn't do it on purpose! It was already a bit cracked but if I didn't fill it up too much it still worked.” Raph turned the glass in his hands, scraping the pad of his thumb against the crack as if he could smooth it back together.

 

“Do we actually have any spare? I'll tell Master Splinter next time he goes out to look for a replacement.” Leonardo answered.

 

“Yeah, there's a spare one... oh.”

 

The three of them stared at the bright orange plastic cup as Raphael placed it slowly on the table. Mikey had drawn a cat nose, smiling mouth and whiskers on one side of it near the top so it would look like he was a smiling kitty when he drank out of it. He remembered when he'd done it. He'd drawn an upside-down M ' _so I can read it when I'm drinking, duh_ ' he'd said and then decided it looked like a cat mouth and added the triangle nose and whiskers to it. He'd spent the next few days talking to Donnie into the cup pretending to be a cat. It had started off annoying him to no end but it had annoyed Raph _even more_ and he had laughed with Mikey about it for days.

 

It felt as if someone had sucked the air out of the kitchen and left them in a timeless vacuum to suffocate.

 

None of them moved until Leonardo spoke up. “Well, I guess you can use it until Master Splinter can get you ano-”

 

“No.”

 

Donatello didn't realise he had said it until the others turned toward him. Leonardo look like he'd been caught doing something terrible, guilt written all over his face at his words, probably wishing he could take them back. Raphael's lips were trembling as his eyes kept darting between both of his brothers. He wanted them to stop. It wasn't what they thought, they'd misunderstood him.

 

“You can't.” He started to explain. “You can't use it because... you can't...” His voice was trembling though and he couldn't really come up with a reason, with a logical explanation other than it was wrong. It didn't feel right to use _his_ things, those orange things that had been placed in the world as gifts for _him_ even if they were just bits of plastic wrap or rope... or cups with kitty smiles. Orange things placed in a world he was no longer a part of.

 

A sound was building up in his throat but before it could escape he snatched up the kitty-cup and ran away from his brothers and the way they looked at him sadly, as if they understood. He heard Raph whimper as he closed the door behind him and shut out their sounds, collapsing onto the bed, _Mikey's bed_ , that didn't smell like him because he had changed the sheets the day after he'd disappeared. Why did he do that? He shouldn't have touched anything.

 

He hugged the cup to his chest and muffled a strangled wail into the pillow.

 

There was _nothing_ in these things. He thought as he gasped for air. They were only objects, orange things that had no soul. His little brother wasn't haunting them and nothing would happen if they were thrown out or used by someone else. There was no reason why Raph shouldn't be able to use it, it was just a colour and a bit of marker. It was just a colour, it didn't mean anything.

 

Then why did it hurt so much?

 

Sensei entered the room much later than he had expected, when he was already calmed down and drifting off to sleep. He pulled the cup from his son's hands and placed it on the shelf above the bed before scooping Donatello into his arms and carrying him off to his own bed where he stayed with him until he was fast asleep.

 

He didn't really have to, he was fine. It had only been a momentary lapse, and yet he still felt greatly relieved when the next day Master Splinter brought white mugs and plates for everyone along with a bolt of black cloth they cut their new masks out of.

 


End file.
